We are all taught it as children. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. In lamens terms: treat others as you want to be treated. We call it the ‘Golden Rule.’ Most of my life I lived by this rule. It was my mantra and it made me happy. Putting others and their happiness first really came naturally to me. It felt truly amazing to know that something I did brought happiness to someone. But about midway through my teens, I turned, for lack of a better word, bitter. I began to feel really vulnerable and started becoming angry. Angry that I would treat others the way I wanted to be treated but wouldn’t receive the same treatment.

To be honest, this was right around the time that I started to realize that life can be a beach. If you know what I mean. And soon enough, ‘Treat others the way you want to be treated’ turned into ‘Treat others the way they treat you.’ Now, do you see what I meant when I said I turned bitter? Yeah, not so good. I stopped going out of my way to do things for others if I felt as if I didn’t matter to them. I became more reserved with my energy and short with those whom I viewed as rude or selfish.

Basically, my new mantra became, ‘If you want me to respect you, you better earn it.’ Now there is nothing wrong if this is your point of view. I know plenty of people who work this way, and if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. Am I right? But for me, I started to become really unhappy. Are you aware of what your core values are? If not, don’t worry! That’s a subject for a different day. But the reason I bring this up is that when you are living your values most deeply rooted at your core, your life has a purpose. You feel whole and fulfilled.

And one of my top five core values is…can you guess it? Yep, compassion. Sympathetic pity and concern for the sufferings or misfortunes of others. BOOM! When I realized that, it hit me. That must be why I am so drawn to the Golden Rule. That must be why I was so happy when I was living my life according to it. You see, when I used the word bitter earlier I said it was for lack of a better word. That is because I didn’t like who I was or how I was thinking then. But who else hasn’t said “Well, I guess it’s every man for himself” at some point in their life? We really are living in a very competitive time in a very competitive world after all.

But, if you’re like me and you have compassion as one of your core values, I’ve got three tips that have helped me and will help you incorporate it into your everyday life. After, hopefully, you’ll feel happier and fulfilled! (Trust me, I know how crazy it sounds. I used to think the same thing.)

1) Accept that you have no control over others and their feelings or actions.
The only person you have control over is yourself. Once you realize that, life becomes so much simpler. And don’t get me wrong! I’m still a total newb at this myself. But I’ve begun to learn that no matter what you do or say, others will interpret you based on a variety of factors! Information they have gained about you (which may or may not be from a reliable source), their insecurity or confidence level, or even a negative experience you might not know they are going through. So try to begin thinking ‘Love me or hate me, I still love you.’

2) Fight the need to retaliate.
This is what I did when my mantra became, ‘Treat others the way they treat you.’ Humans naturally tend to fight back when we are treated poorly. But if we try to live by the Golden Rule, it just means we don’t let those poor actions cause us to make poor actions. And by no means do you have to be the people-pleaser just to appease everyone! It’s important to be assertive and know what you deserve/how you should be treated. But something I’ve been working on remembering is to not let temporary anger/upset/etc cause permanent consequences.

3) Be helpful.
As I said earlier, we are living in a world consumed by competition. With that, people have a tendency to stick to themselves and have a hard time trusting others. We tend to ignore the problems of others because we’ve got our own to worry about. But oddly enough, I am happiest in life when I am helping others. I love knowing that I have the power to make someone happy without having to sacrifice much. I like the feeling of being appreciated as a person just for caring. And most importantly, I know I can make a difference. I talked a bit about this in my post, Why Care About Caring if you would like to read more about that.

What does the Golden Rule mean to you and how do you find ways to apply it in your life? I want you to comment below and let me know what your mantra for treating others is! And if you find this post helpful, please share so someone else can hopefully find value in it too(:

So until next time, remember to have fun and make life as simple as could be! Thanks for stopping by!

XoXo-Branndolynne(: