Whether you’ve been at home or you’re an essential worker, there’s no doubt the level of stress upon us all right now. And the worst part, in my opinion, is that there’s no end in sight to all this. But with all this added stress, it’s important to take the time for yourself and your relationship right now.
Common nuisances are becoming triggers. Anxiety is creeping up in times where it never has before. Now is a great time to find ways to take care of yourself! That’s a lot easier said than done when you have Little (or not-so-little) Ones around. But it can be done!
I’ve asked some Mommas (single and taken alike) what they are doing to help keep themselves sane through all this. I’ve also done my fair amount of research on this topic, especially as the circumstances have changed recently. And I’ve gathered up the best solutions I could find to help myself and others who are wondering the same thing.
‘We Time’
For those in a relationship from married to dating, or anything in between, it’s important to take time to nourish the relationship you have. This time is hard on all of us. And it’s important for your partner to know you’re there for them and vice versa. Rachel Hollis said that for the partner who does the minority of the housework, regardless of who the breadwinner is, it’s time to step up! And if you’re the partner who does the majority of the work and your partner is stepping up, appreciate it! Who cares if it’s done the ‘correct’ way or not as long as it’s done.
If you’re in a relationship with kids, it’s especially important to nourish your relationship and the love you shared before them. It’s a lot easier if you have kids that are older and can watch themselves while you have some alone time. But if you have little Little Ones, it’s obviously not that easy. There are 2 options you can work with. 1) Bring them along for the fun. 2) Either get up early or stay up late. Option 1 is if you don’t feel safe leaving the child unattended or have no way of having a reasonable downtime with them. Option 2 is if you do feel safe leaving the child unattended (but not going far) or they are on a routine that works with your schedule.
Every relationship takes hard work and focus, and sometimes it’s easy to become stuck in a routine. Sometimes it’s easy to remain where it’s comfortable. So it’s important to focus on and give positive energy to my relationships. Now I’m working on nurturing and exploring my relationship in new ways I wouldn’t have otherwise thought of. Or had the time to do. But I have to remember to find the balance between my relationship with my fiancé as well as my relationship with my not-so-little.
‘Me Time’
For those that are navigating this stress alone, it’s super important to nourish yourself, mentally, physically, and spiritually. This time is already hard, and most of us feel alone even if we aren’t. So take the time to focus on yourself, especially if you don’t have Little Ones yet. Fuel your brain with knowledge, inspiration, and motivation. Yes, it’s okay to pay attention to the news, but just don’t absorb too much. Move your body whether it’s through exercise, yoga/pilates, or even taking a walk. Get those juices flowing. Most importantly, check in with yourself spiritually to see if you’re where you want to be. Find things that make you feel whole and fulfilled.
If you’re alone and have kids, well, first of all, I just want to bow down to you. Right now it’s extra important to nourish your health mentally, physically, and spiritually. Yes, it will definitely be easier if you have kids old enough to watch themselves while you have some alone time. But if you have little Little Ones, it can still be done. There are a few options here. 1) Get up earlier than them. 2) Stay up later than them. 3) Use nap time unconventionally. Option 1 is if you are a morning person. (I’ve personally tried and I just can’t bring myself to do it, props to those who can.) Option 2 is if you are a night person. Once they’re in bed, it’s on. And Option 3 is to not be productive when they are napping. Use that time for yourself to do whatever it is you need ‘me time’ for.
Just Do It
Whether you read that as a Nike reference or a Shia LeBeouf reference, (personally I think of Shia) I mean exactly that. Just do it. Take the time for your relationship and yourself to do things that will not only bring happiness, but will help keep you going. Like I said, it may feel like we’re in this alone, and some of us may really be in this alone, (my heart goes out to you) but we don’t have to really be alone. Be there for others, let others be there for you, and most importantly, be there for yourself.
What do you think? Have you been able to find
As always, thank you so very much for being a part of ETM’s community of Mommas! I encourage you to join discussions, interact with Mommas alike, and be unapologetically yourself! Until next time, I hope I’m able to help make your life as simple as could be. (:
With all my love, Brandolyn – Earth To Momma
