One whole month. It’s been one month since the start of my journey of self-discovery, or rediscovery to be more accurate. A metamorphosis if you will. You see, like the butterfly and the caterpillar, I’ve been me all along. Just like you’ve been you all along through all of your changes and growth, and others have been themselves too.

Sometimes life gets messy, and messy isn’t always bad. There’s good messy like dirty hands from playing or working. That’s not bad, is it? But it always helps to do a little bit of cleaning up to see what’s actually good messy and bad messy, because yes, there’s bad messy too. And the best way to start cleaning up is with yourself and what you have control over.

Here’s where I need some improvement still:

Just be yourself. How many times have you heard that phrase before? It’s probably one of the most popular phrases in terms of self-development advice actually. But it’s probably as effective as telling someone not to worry. Or as easy as learning multiple languages fluently. You get the picture.

So many people out there would love to ‘just be themselves’ but it’s not just a switch that we can turn on at our convenience. Truthfully, it can be one of the hardest things to do. Not because people want to be fake, but because it can be in our human nature.

Think about it. What happens when you meet someone for the first time? If their demeanor is calm and laid back how do you approach them? How is your demeanor if they are more energetic and involved? In reality, our interpretation of others often causes us to project only a part of our personality.

Now I get that some people don’t care about what others think of them and aren’t afraid to be themselves at all times. In fact, I used to envy them. But now I look up to them. For some of us, it can take some time to warm up to someone before we show all of who we are. However, this isn’t always easy. Or smart.

It isn’t easy because we live in a day in age where people must make snap decisions. If you are only projecting a part of your personality, others will form an opinion about you based on that instead of the whole, real you. You probably even have some of your own opinions about someone that were formed without knowing the entire person.

It isn’t very smart because when we are only projecting a part of our personalities for a certain amount of time, others will begin to assume that is us as a whole. Then when you open up and begin to project more parts of your personality, others may become confused and even upset.

It may even get to a point where you become unsure what parts of your personality you should project. So, although it may be hard to ‘just be yourself’, I have three pieces of advice I’d like to share with you. Hopefully, it will at least get you one step closer to being the whole, real you.

1) Declare what your life is for.
I’m not saying it has to be carved in stone. But reminding yourself who you are and what you want in life helps you embrace your real self. And when you embrace yourself, it’s easier to project your whole self to others. You become the person who isn’t afraid to be themselves at all times.

2) Even if some people don’t accept you, it really doesn’t matter.
It truly is better to have one true friend than a handful of acquaintances. True friends will put up with your bullshit, be there for you at your breaking points, and love you for who you really are. But you have to be willing to show your true self from day one. This way it’s actually easier to determine who your real friends are too. Aka the ones who accept your real self from day one.

3) Listen to your gut and be honest always.
If your gut tells you that what you’re doing is not only right but right for you, follow your intuition. This will help you build confidence and be more open to projecting the real you. Also, being honest shows that you are human and genuine. It attracts people who are like you. So might as well attract those who are like the real you, right?

The bottom line is this: don’t ‘just be yourself’. Be unafraid to show the real you. The whole you. Be unapologetically yourself at all times, without worrying or caring what others might think. We all have one life to live. I guarantee you will run across one person (if not many) who will genuinely love you for all of you.

So, your turn. Do you sometimes find it hard to be yourself? Let me know in the comments which aspect you struggle with and one way you plan on projecting your whole personality starting today(: And until next time, remember to have fun and make life as simple as could be!

With all my love, Brandolyn – Earth To Momma